sitting in the train - the 079 caroliner - headed from baltimore, md to durham, nc. we've been waiting at washington dc for a little bit now. it surprised me how crowded the train was, at first especially compared to my experiences with the amtrak back in cali. but when most people got off at washington it all made sense to me. just me, my guitar and a backpack. back to the basics, no hassles. i'm still trying to wrap my head around it all. the time spent with abe was intense. learned a lot from the guy and found a good friend in him to boot. he walked with me inside the station, playing my jazzmaster. dropped me off and said our goodbyes. it's been a good 2 hours, i do believe, and i feel weird, phased, i guess. i don't know if that's the right way to use that word, but if you're familliar with phase shifters you can imagine. caught in this gaseous state in between trips. not really part of anything at the moment, not really started anything. just this weird, transitional phase. it's looking good, but it's strange. i feel this form of sadness, leaving abe and all, but neither do i extatic to be moving on, doing new things. it's this weird middle-ground. kind of peacfull, zoned and spaced out. like a thin veil is surrounding me and protecting me from the bad and the good. in utero, in the womb. went out and ate sushi last night with abe and janice, some symbolic closure to the good times past. i went ahead and got the new norah jones cd too. walked past it a bunch of times over the past few weeks and i finally just had to get it. i have just listened to it and i like it, i think it's good. it seems to capture this feeling quite well. writing about it seems to let my head make some sense of it all.
if you've made it this far you'll probably start to realise that i've left the maryland farm and abe behind. i've had such a good time spending time with him, makes me smile thinking back on it. there's not a whole lot of people that make me step up on a personal level, and sort of force me to grow. but it's a very organic process, it's unconcious, very much so. however, my position as a playing musician wasn't set in stone yet, since the manager, blane, wanted to bring in some more, professional musicians and try those out, i just felt like i had to take the leap again and move on. they offered me a steady position to stick around, but i don't want to settle for 'second best' or 'safe', not playing. on my way right now to go see scotty down in north carolina and drive out together to california. got a one-way ticket to tokyo, japan for february 27th. the day after my birthday, imagine that. now that i think about it, two days from now it'll be a year to the day that i came to america to 'travel the world for rock'n'roll' as brant aptly put it. bunchloads has happened and now the story continues. i'm going to japan beause i feel like the music scene is a little less saturated than over here in america, or europe for that matter. from what i know, and what my gut-feeling says, they're more open for new things, especially if they're foreighn and 'exotic'. i'm hoping to make some good friends and get a three-piece band together. and, in the process improve on my japanese. i'm taking a little break from writing now. i bought a dvd on thelonious monk yesterday entitled 'straight no chaser'. appearantly clint eastwood directed it, wow, what a trip! i'll spiel some more later.